Gratitude and Appreciation

I've learned a lot about appreciation and gratefulness in the last ten or so years, and most especially in the last two years. And one of the most important lessons I've learned is to put it out there: tell people how much you appreciate them, how grateful you are for their acts of kindness, caring, friendship. It's good for the soul -- yours and theirs.

We all need help from time to time and the importance of friends and family in time of need can't be overstated. Which brings two things to mind for me: the old saying "You get to Heaven leaning on the arm of a friend," and that great song, "Lean On Me."

Last year I had to lean on others, which was very difficult for me. I have always prided myself on my self-sufficiency, on being capable, and I hated to ask for help. But by June, I had reached a point where I could barely get from my bedroom to the kitchen on crutches. Thank goodness they offered help and I had the good sense not to refuse.

I have serious issues with my hips and unbeknown to me, I was also stressing my body with the diet I was eating. I thought it was a healthy one and by most standards it was. But not for me. It was causing so much pain that my body was literally shutting down. At times I lay and cried because there was no relief from the relentless pain that had spread slowly over two years from my hips to encompass my legs, my back, my shoulders and even my hands. The only part of me that didn't hurt was my head. I was able to do less and less. As a last resort, I went to an allopathic doctor. He was good and truly wanted to help, but the pain killer he prescribed barely scratched the surface. A different one made me so dizzy I was afraid to try to walk. He sent me to a specialist, but it took almost six months to get in, and another two for the first procedure to ease the hip pain. In the meantime, I continued looking for alternative healing methods.

In the several months I was incapacitated, my daughter, Heather, came over and vacuumed and cleaned for me. She went to the grocery store for me. She came and got me and drove me 45 minutes to a naturopath, who, I swear, saved my life. I knew about him because of friend named Glenna, who called, shared her experiences with me, and loaned me her natural health books. Tawana, who had taken many credits at a homeopathic school, came over, spent almost a whole day with her books and remedies, helping me figure out what might work in this situation and gave me the remedies.

Shari, my next door neighbor watered my yard, carried out my garbage and recycle bins, and brought them back up to the garage for me, week after week. She also made grocery store runs for me. Susan came over all summer and fall after work, and mowed my yard. I have over a third of an acre lot, so we're not talking postage stamp! When she couldn't mow, Mira drove 45 minutes to do it. Susan had also helped me financially in numerous ways, including buying my meals when we'd go out. Satya came from Virginia and stayed two weeks, helping me while taking care of her own business concerns that had brought her here. My son Brian helped out financially from out of state, and around the house and yard when he visited.

Randall, Andy, and Mark carried five gallon jugs of water in for me, moved plants and furniture. Ina brought over a sack of special foods and a diet that helped me eliminate the worst of the pain. Paula gives me massages in return for face reading lessons and astrology readings.

It took a village to bring me back from the brink and I learned the joy and humility of allowing people to care, to help, to show their love. It changed me.

I've learned to be grateful, to say so immediately and often, and to be ready to give as much as I'm able to in return. When I do these things, it's amazing how willing others are to offer a hand, a shoulder, or even a back, time and time again. Honest thank yous and telling people how important they are to me, and how much I appreciate their help gives genuine strokes and builds a closeness you can't create any other way.

This kind of interchange from the heart expands relationships to a new depth and height. We should all learn that simple lesson and grease the wheels of mutual support and mutual appreciation. We build heart connections that last as long as consciousness exists.

And because of this experience, I'm now convinced that pure love is at the core of human nature.

Saundra_M